Vimbai Murenga's Story

From Abused to Abuser to Healed: Finding My Identity After Abuse

When I joined ROOTS in 2019, I was a mess, trapped in a viciously abusive relationship. I was verbally, emotionally, and physically broken. I had completely lost myself—my self-worth, my confidence, and all hope. I believed I didn't even deserve to breathe.

The worst part was that the abuse changed me. I adapted to my toxic environment and became a monster myself. I took the pain inflicted on me and "did it better," becoming abusive, a bully with uncontrollable anger outbursts towards my partner, my mom, and even my twin. The most devastating consequence was that, as a mother, I was cold and unloving to my own son. I couldn't even recognize the person I had become.

My turning point was my first ROOTS grounding session. Hearing Mai Shereni speak about identity was a wake-up call. The discipleship helped me dig to the real root of the problem: the deep-seated pain of rejection from my father.

The first step ROOTS taught me was forgiveness. I had to forgive my dad. It wasn't overnight, but I started there. Then, I had to forgive my ex-husband, and most importantly, I had to apologize for the monster I had become. Finally, I had to learn to forgive myself.

Serving in the children’s ministry was part of my healing. God used it to realign my motherly heart. The Holy Spirit whispered, "What you're doing right now with these kids is what I want you to do with your child."

The healing is real. Last year, my son told me, "Mom, you're kind to me now." Those words made me cry; they were the proof of my transformation.

Now, as a commissioned graduate, I have a purpose. I run a schools ministry for girls, many of whom struggle with father issues. Because I went through it, I can now help them overcome. My journey from a broken victim to a healed helper is a testament to God's power, and I am so grateful.